Night of Fire
by amidoh
Summary: Throwing an impromtu party on his blimp was probably the most stupid thing Kaiba's ever done in his life. Now who can save him from assorted teenagers who are desperately looking for more intimacy than romance? MR YYM YYYB SJ OM ::yaoi::
1. A random beginning for a random story

Disclaimer: The song is called Night of Fire and is owned by DDR (Dance Dance Revolution) and YuGiOh isn't mine either.

_Fire_

_Night of fire_

_Night of fire_

_Fire_

_Welcome to the broken low_

_Welcome to the famous disco night_

_Come on lady come and go_

_Come on lady get me once and right_

_Not the danger, not the blacky stranger_

_Rocket - rocket - look to my door I'll open_

_Speak my name now, speak it if you know how_

_Fly to me, get ready for the.._

_Night of fire - you'd better better stay_

_You'd better better begin to pray today_

_Night of fire - come over over me_

_Come over over the top you've never been here_

_Night of fire - you'd better better stay_

_You'd better better begin the prayer today_

_Night of fire - come over over me_

_Come on over the top you'll have a night of fire_

_You'll have a night of fire_

_Oh oh oh oh oh - oh oh oh_

_Night of fire_

---

It was the most high-profile party in months; everyone in Domino High knew about it. It was open even to people who didn't go to the school, even people who were supposed to go but bunked off. Everyone who was anyone would be going. All over Domino, teens would be buying new outfits for the get together, which was the most talked about thing since a new mall had opened in town.

Kaiba had repaired the blimp he had used for the Battle City finals and was, for apparently no reason that was known to the public, throwing a party in it to which everyone was invited, like something a popular street club may have done only a hundred times better because it would be 4000 feet in the air. The true reasoning behind the party, of course, was that Mokuba was insisting that he get a date or, in the blacknette's words, "get yourself a fucking boyfriend and get laid!". The little darling had grown up so well in the past year. Maybe, the CEO had pondered on many an occasion, he shouldn't have sent Mokuba round to Yuugi's house when he needed a baby-sitter, as Jounouchi and Honda were often there.

After an intense amount of grovelling, begging, wheedling and, as a last resort, being an annoying little prick, Yuugi had managed to persuade his quite overprotective yami to let him go to the party. In truth, Yami himself wanted to go – especially when he learned that Jounouchi and Honda would be going. At least he wouldn't be the only person there for Kaiba to victimise, as long as Jou was there… it was a cruel but true thought, Kaiba and Jou got on like a house on fire. Have you ever been in a burning house?

In truth, it was probably Anzu who had persuaded Yami to go in the first place. She had been the one who had told him about it, and she had also been the one who had actually camped outside his door until he had been forced to say yes just to make her go away. It was sad, how dedicated she had become to him over the last year. He would have such a laugh when he finally told her that he was gay.

The Pharaoh had been quite surprised to find that most of his friends were gay. Otogi Ryuuji, for all his flirting with Shizuka, was gay and had only been using her as a cover-up, which was why he had relented and let Honda have her. Of course, Shizuka had something to say about that, and it involved a slap that even now stung the Honda's cheek. Yuugi, of course, preferred boys; the Pharaoh had known because he shared a mind link with his hikari and they could occasionally read each others thoughts. No one was really sure about Jou or Kaiba, or even little Bakura Ryou – he was so introvert that no one really was sure about anything concerning him these days. It was well known that the Ishtars, Malik and his yami, were bisexual, and Yami no Bakura… well, let's leave it there.

Unfortunately, Yami and Yuugi had left it to the last minute to choose what they were going to wear and now, the day before the big party, they were both hurrying through shops on the High Street, looking rather stressed and trying on different assorted disco-wear.

At Kaiba's insistence, and at great inconvenience to the two tri-nettes, everyone at the party was to be wearing a mask of some sort, if only to make the shagging more interesting – a blind date, shall we say. Yuugi had thought it was a wonderful idea, right up until the point Yami had reminded him he had to find and buy a mask. Now he thought it was stupid to fork out a load of money for a useless item he would probably only wear once.

Yami chose quickly, having gone into a Punk-Goth shop and found some tight black leather pants and a fishnet top, over which he wore a black leather jacket. He chose two plain white masks from a craft shop – the kind hat kids paint and stick feathers on in art class, giving one to Yuugi, who was having a little more trouble with his outfit, as he wasn't quite as outgoing as his yami.

It was just at the moment that the Pharaoh gave Yuugi his mask when Anzu spotted them from behind a tanktop and a miniskirt she was carrying, calling their names in greeting. Yami instantly had to repress suicidal tendencies, but Yuugi was more than happy to greet his friend, who informed them that Kaiba had retracted his rule about masks.

"He says it's a waste of time." She commented airily, as though she had known it all along. "So you can throw those vulgar things away." Indicating the masks and flicking her shoulder-length brown hair out of her face, the girl gave the distinct impression of having been a natural blonde.

"I'll give them to a kid I meet on the street." Yuugi, ever the charitable one, agreed. "They can have fun painting them. I always used to love being creative." Admittedly, he had always been the mushier one out of the hikari/yami duo, much more prone to volunteer charity work and donate to a profitable cause than Atem, who was an obsessive hoarder and kept everything he could in a box under Yuugi's bed. If the milder tri-nette dared approach the box and ask him to give something away, he would often growl ferally until Yuugi got the gist and went away. The King of Games had learnt his lesson after Yami actually bit him on the hand when he touched the box, and now stayed well away from any of the Pharaoh's possessions.

"Obnoxious cow." Yami spat after the flouncing airhead as she retreated back to her tanktops and miniskirts. Things had been taut between Anzu and the Pharaoh ever since Marik had come out to Yuugi about being bisexual. Who could ever forget that scathing tone, the hate in the brunette girl's voice as she told Yami and Yuugi that they'd 'better not even think about wasting their life shagging boys like that bastard Egyptian and his whore of a hikari.' A fine was she was to talk about whores.

After the relief of learning that masks weren't needed, Yuugi began browsing around the shops again, looking for an outfit to wear to the party.

In retrospect, perhaps it was foolish to ask for Yami's help; the Egyptian Pharaoh had a very distinct idea about what was suitable.

Yuugi's face was as red as a sunburned tomato – he really had been stupid to get annoyed at not finding anything to wear and asking Yami to choose something for him really had been a mistake. Now he would be going to the party wearing hipster tight jeans and a tie-dye hoody of the persuasion that Malik wore, namely that it showed off his middle. Neither of the garments really suited his stereotypically innocent personality, but at least Yami had waited until they were in the privacy of their own home before bursting out laughing.

"Thanks a lot, you horrible person!" Yuugi tried to make his voice sound stern and reproving, but even he had to bite back a laugh as he hung the clothes up in his wardrobe. Thank Ra he had kept those masks – they were looking more inviting by the second, one to wear so he could hide his red face at the party and the other to use as something he could shove in a rather inconvenient and quite painful place of his yami's anatomy. It was out of character for sweet little Yuugi to be thinking such lewd, dishonourable thoughts.

Sugoroku, thankfully, hadn't seen the outlandish outfit that his grandson was going to wear to the party. Yuugi had informed the elder Motou that he was going for a sleepover at Jounouchi's house, which wasn't completely untrue. The party would last all night, and there was plenty of accommodation aboard the blimp to sleep. It just wouldn't be at Jou's house that Yuugi and Yami were sleeping, but Sugoroku didn't need to know that. There were lots of things that Yuugi had to keep from his grandfather, who assumed that he was still the innocent little teen he had been at Duellist Kingdom. For example, the fact that Domino High seemed to be turning into a gay community. Yuugi had yet to find one class that didn't have at least three 'strange fucking rabbits', as Anzu had christened them.

It was planned that everyone was to be at the blimp by noon, where they would be fed lunch and then shown to their rooms, giving them all time to shower and change into party clothes before the party began at six, which was the given time for take off. Sugoroku had had a minor nervous breakdown when Yuugi said he had to meet Jou at half past eleven; as far as the elder man knew, Yuugi wasn't even up by that time. In truth, Yuugi was a naturally early riser, but Yami preferred to stay in bed until the early hours of the afternoon, occasionally until the evening if he could manage it, and Yuugi never went anywhere without his yami, which meant his grandfather was given the impression that he was a lazy bugger.

So it was in good humour that Yuugi and Yami met up with Jounouchi, Honda and Anzu in the Clock Tower Square at half eleven, each with their outfit in a bag, as well as toiletries and whatever they may need during the night. Anzu was busy telling Honda that she had brought breath freshener but, as Yami commented to Yuugi through the mind link, she'd have to knock a guy unconscious before he would allow her to kiss him, so breath freshener wasn't really necessary.

In Yuugi's opinion, these nasty comments about Anzu were slightly one sided, and that one side was the side of hatred that Yami gave off. To the smaller tri-nette, Anzu, though occasionally slightly annoying, was nice enough as a friend and had the added bonus that she could make bullies go away just by talking at them, which the shorter boy preferred to actual violence, like Jou and Honda resorted to.

"Who else is going to be there?" Yuugi asked, started polite conversation and rescuing a thankful Honda from replying to a particularly barbed question about the freshness of his breath.

"Everyone." Jou shrugged, hoisting his bag over his shoulder and beginning to walk in the direction of where the blimp would be, causing everyone else to follow him. "Anyone who's anyone. It's impossible to give a list."

"Shizuka's going to be there." Honda ticked one name off his fingers. "She came all the way from out of town to come to this party." He absently raised one hand to his cheek.

"Get over it, Honda." Jou snapped in his thick accent. "You know that she prefers Otogi to you."

"Thanks for the ego boost." Honda replied snarkily, hitting Jou upside the head. "Anyway, what a waste that is! Otogi shags boys."

"And what's wrong with that?" Yami asked, slightly annoyed. It sounded as though Anzu had been talking to Honda for maybe a little _too_ long.

"Nothing, nothing, I was just saying!" Honda desperately tried to get out of the hole he had just dug, as there's nothing worse than having an ancient Pharaoh destined to save the world from destruction get pissed off with you. He might just leave the world to be destroyed if you pushed him far enough.

"Oh, stop bickering." Yuugi protested amiably. He couldn't really get mad at his friends, it would be boring without them arguing like a married foursome. "We're here, and I think it would be wise if we were to set a good example, ok?"

There were grumbled noises of assent from the group and Yuugi nodded in satisfaction, just as Isono, Kaiba's right hand man, came out from the blimp to greet them.

"Names?" He asked, winking at them all from behind dark glasses. Of course he recognised them from the Battle City tournament; Yuugi had won the Battle City crown, a defeat that was still a sore point with the CEO himself, even a year later.

"Motou Yuugi, Jounouchi Katsuya, Honda Hiroto and Mazaki Anzu." Yuugi said, and Isono searched in a clear plastic bag, giving each a card. "Are the rooms next to each other?"

"Yes." The suit nodded, leading them in to the blimp and towards the elevator that had been used so frequently in the tournament finals. It certainly was nostalgic seeing the interior of this place again, bringing back memories, both good and bad, of Battle City. "Don't loose these cards – they are the only passage back into your rooms. I would advise you to keep them about your person at all times."

Isono led them out of the elevator on the third deck, showing them through a network of corridors to their rooms, each of which had the same number as that printed on the card key.

"The disco deck is deck number two." He stated before they could get into their rooms and dump their stuff. "That is the deck one below you, and the lunch deck is this one. Follow the red arrows on the corridor."

With those words, he left.

Looking round at the corridor, Yuugi could see what Isono meant. On the wall at each fork, there were a number of different coloured arrows, usually a red, a yellow and a purple.

"See you in a minute then, Yuugi?" Yami asked, having already opened their room and disappeared inside, taking both his and Yuugi's stuff to dump on the beds. Kaiba had been nice and had given certain people rooms with two beds, namely those with a yami to cater for as well as themselves. Yuugi nodded at the Pharaoh and watched as his other friends disappeared into their own rooms to dump their stuff and jazz up for lunch.

Yami reappeared a minute later, still in the same clothes as before. It would be stupid to change into the party outfits now, as they had lunch to eat first and chances were that at least one of them would spill something over themselves and be forced to wear normal clothes to the disco. Yuugi could think of only one thing more embarrassing than turning up in casuals when everyone else was jazzed up and that was going in what Yami had picked out for him, but he didn't mention it, not wanting to hurt the 5000 year old spirit's feelings. After being locked in a puzzle for millennia, Yami had an excuse for not being quite as up to date in fashion as, say, those who worked at Versace.

As the others came out of their rooms, it became blatantly obvious that Jou was more than unhappy with the room he'd been given. The fact that Yuugi could almost see the steam coming from his ears half gave it away. The honey-eyed blonde was red in the face and a tic was going rapidly in one cheek.

"That… that _bastard_!" He fumed, holding up something in a photo frame for the others to see. Kaiba had somehow got a hold of a picture of Jounouchi, in the dog costume that Otogi had forced him into, and had set it on the bedside table, if only to make a statement. "I am _not_ a bleeding _puppy_!"

"Calm down." Honda snapped, relieving Jou of the picture frame and throwing it back in his room before closing the door. "That's how Kaiba wants you to react. Just ignore it. If you start a fight with him, he'll have Isono throw you out while we're in the air. Don't forget, it was he who allowed you to come in the first place."

"Yeah, I'm so grateful." Jou rolled his eyes, causing Yuugi to hide a smile behind his hand as Anzu grabbed him by the ear and tugged the teen with the accent into silent submission.

"Shall we go?" Yami rolled his eyes impatiently, increasingly annoyed by the whole fiasco of the picture frame. Though Jou was his friend as well as Yuugi's, he could half see where Kaiba was coming from. There were times when it was too easy to visualise Jou barking and wagging a shaggy tail.

Sensing that Yami was having a pissy mood swing, Yuugi decided it was probably best to do as the Pharaoh said before he decreed to have them all sent to the Shadow Realm, or something else in the melodramatic, so, showing a surprising amount of strength for someone so vertically challenged, he forcibly separated Jou and Anzu and set off following the red arrows, like Isono had directed.

The dining area was colossal covering the entire front of the third deck meaning it was surrounded by windows. When the blimp was in the air during the night, dinner would really be an amazing experience, surrounded on all sides by the pinpoint lights of the city. There were already a number of teenagers seated at small tables, or standing next to the windows eating food from a buffet in the middle of the room, though no one there was recognisable as nameable by Yuugi, who knew a good number of people. Perhaps the others that he knew were coming were still in their rooms, or just hadn't arrived yet. The deadline for arrivals wasn't for another quarter of an hour, at any rate.

At the sight of food, Jou's mouth began to water and, in an instant, he was over by the buffet, a plate and serving implements in hand, loading tofu and bean curd onto his plate, followed by some nigiri sushi, seasoned with a dash of soy sauce. Honda rolled his eyes but followed in almost exactly the same way, piling gunkan and musashi noodles onto his plate. Both then rocketed to a table and began eating ravenously, Anzu shaking her head and laughing before following, nothing at all to eat. Yami was convinced she was trying to give herself anorexia.

Yuugi got himself two plates, one for him and one for Yami, and served himself with tofu, bean curd and some of the oshizushi, yet another kind of sushi, walking over to join his friends at the table that they had picked, which was nearer one of the darker corners, further from the window.

"Hello, strangers." A voice came from behind Yuugi and he turned round, jerking in shock, to see the brightly smiling face of Malik Ishtar. Anzu gave a disgusted yet pointedly obvious snort, which the Egyptian ignored. "Haven't seen you around in a while." He spoke both to the small tri-nette and the Pharaoh. "What have you been doing with yourselves?"

"Nothing much, Malik." Yuugi shrugged. "Have a seat?" The vertically challenged one indicated the sixth seat at the table, the one between Jou and Honda, which was unoccupied. Nodding, Ishtar sat gratefully.

"Anything to get away from my yami." He explained, casting a glance at the Pharaoh while pointing casually over his shoulder to a brooding Marik, standing alone against the wall on the other side of the room. "You're lucky to get along with yours as well as you do, Yuugi, Marik's been threatening to kill me all day if I go near him tonight. I think he thinks I might endanger his chances of getting a date." Here the Egyptian hikari snorted, as though he believed that Marik didn't need his help to screw up a date. After all, his yami was about as romantic as a dead beetle. If anyone asked him the question: what are your hobbies? His answer would be: 'torture, death…' or, if in a particularly adventurous mood: 'death, torture…'

"So what have you been doing with yourself?" Yuugi asked Malik, just as Jou traipsed back to the buffet to serve himself a second course.

"Nothing in particular. I'm flying free again as well, I just split with my boyfriend." Malik shrugged as though he couldn't really care, again ignoring Anzu as she made a noise of disgust. Never before had any of them met such a blatant homophobe. "Just after he kissed me under some unseasonable mistletoe he told me he liked someone else. Ironic, isn't it?"

"Oh, Malik, I'm sorry." Yuugi answered; there didn't really seem to be much else that he could say to the Egyptian's bland statement. Yami made a small noise of disinterest by the smaller teen's ear. The Pharaoh had never really completely forgiven Malik for all that had happened at Battle City, despite the fact he had accepted that it wasn't entirely the tan teen's fault and mostly the doing of his wild-haired yami.

"Don't be. I was going to break up with him anyway." Another elegant shrug illustrated the words. "I was just really bugged that he broke up with me before I could break up with him. I mean, how embarrassing!"

"Are you thinking of getting yourself a girl now?" Anzu asked, trying to change the subject of the conversation away from gays.

"Why, are you offering?" Malik replied, an automatic comeback. "No, I'm not really looking for anyone in particular, I'll just see who comes my way tonight and if I like any of them. I actually prefer boys to girls, but I'll just as gladly go with either." With what seemed a skilled practise, the Egyptian ignored the outraged look on the brunette girl's face.

"I hope you find someone nice." Yami made his contribution to the conversation, albeit grudgingly, after Yuugi elbowed him in what would have been the ribs had he been a couple of inches shorter, but what was in fact his waistline.

"Thanks." Malik inclined his head to the Pharaoh, something he had done on every meeting ever since his repentance at the end of Battle City. "Urgh. I guess I'd better go and get ready. See you later, perhaps."

"Where's your room?" Yuugi asked, having finished his meal and rising, wondering if it would be wise to accompany the Egyptian back to his room. Malik had to be quite lonely now his boyfriend had gone, no matter how indifferent he seemed, and with the only other constant company he had being Marik, who wasn't renowned for his sociability.

It turned out that Malik's room was right next door to Yuugi's and, on further questioning, the tri-nette discovered that Malik also had been given a double room on request, so at least he didn't have to share a bed with his homicidal yami. Saying their goodbyes until later, the small gang of teens parted to begin getting ready for the party itself, though not before Anzu gave Yuugi a stern lecture on not being like Malik and dating boys after the Egyptian had left.

"Screw her." Yami breathed unconcernedly, flinging himself on his bed, which bounced amusingly once or twice. "I'll damn well shag boys if I want to."

"So will I," Yuugi agreed, his voice pleading, "but please don't say that in front of Anzu. I know she can be a little persistent," here Yami snorted; that was an understatement, "but she's a good friend and she's always stuck up for me."

"All right then, shorty." Yami agreed, watching as Yuugi undressed ready to go into the shower. "Want me to come in with you and make sure you don't fall? And I could make it heat up as well, if the water's too cold."

"_Yami_!"

---

True to the schedule, the blimp took off at precisely six in the evening, cruising over Domino City as the disco began after a short and curt welcome speech from Kaiba himself, who was wearing all black, perfect for hiding in the shadows with.

Yuugi was amazed at the sheer amount of people who were wearing garish costumes, like his own. Contrary to his beliefs, he didn't actually stand out as much as Yami in his tight leather and fishnets, which was a great relief to the shorter tri-nette. Now all that was needed was to shake Anzu off his tail; she was following him like a faithful dog, making sure that 'those horrible queers' stayed well away from him.

That problem, however, was quickly sorted out, as one of the people he recognised from school but didn't know the name of came and wrapped an arm around Anzu's waist, leading her over to the bar, where a strangely familiar whitenette in an open Hawaiian shirt and tight leather pants was serving people with drinks. However, finding no where else to go, Yuugi left Yami in the middle of a crowd of other teens and headed to the bar himself, where he was given an obligatory free drink of what looked like motor oil but turned out to be some sort of non-alcoholic cocktail.

Looking round the room, he noticed a shadowy person who seemed to be watching him from the wall, but he shook that off. Probably just someone glancing round, like he was. There was no sign of Jou anywhere, nor was Kaiba visible, Honda was desperately trying to get a dance off Shizuka, Anzu, of course, was at the bar and Malik was sitting alone at a table near the wall, staring off at the dance floor. And Mokuba… Mokuba seemed to have suffered from a massive growth spurt and, instead of being about Yuugi's height, was now the tallest person in the room.

Oh. That would be because he was sitting on Otogi's shoulders.

Kaiba would have something to say about that, was Yuugi's first thought, as his gaze washed back to the rather-forlorn looking Malik so he could watch the Egyptian. He remembered vaguely that Yami had once told him stalking was bad and it made people paranoid, but Malik gave off the aura of not really being scared of anything, so Yuugi really didn't give a shit – only he didn't give a shit in the equivalent: a milder sentence, with no swear words.

Ishtar rose from his table, which was occupied the very next minute by a couple obviously seeing how long it would take for them both to be naked, and trying to do it in record time. Shaking his head slightly in amusement, Malik began to walk to the bar, meaning to get a refill for his drink, which was alcoholic, of course. Nothing lightweight for our man Malik!

Before he ever made it to the bar, however, a timid and shy looking whitenette whom he had noticed hugging the wall for the entire party literally fell at his feet, having tripped over the badly flailing limbs of one person who really couldn't dance.

"Are you all right?" The Egyptian asked, holding out a hand to help the paler teen up, watching the other one's face when the whitenette stood, holding tightly on to his hand, a light pink tinge gracing his cheeks. "I haven't seen you since Battle City… Ryou."

"My memory of the tournament isn't the best…" Ryou Bakura mumbled in his stereotypically British accent. "I can't remember what your name is, or even seeing you before." The whitenette, though he didn't seem to remember Malik at all, was still holding on to the proffered hand.

"Malik Ishtar." Malik introduced himself with an uncaring shrug. "I was working with your yami." The lilac eyes met the chocolate brown ones, which widened and looked away, Ryou still not letting go of Malik's hand.

"Well, he's over there serving drinks if you want a word." Ryou indicated with his spare hand, trying to mask the disappointment he felt at the possibility of yet another person preferring his yami over him. Bakura was more outgoing, and less caring about what he said, while Ryou had a reputation for being shy and introvert.

"No thanks, I think there's probably bad blood between us after I got him banished to the Shadow Realm for a while." Malik gave a smile. "I think if he never saw me again it would be too soon." Ryou had to give a weak smile at that and again met Malik's eyes. The two of them stayed there for a while, just staring into each others eyes as though each was trying to read the other's mind, Ryou still not letting go of the tanned hand he held.

"It's too perfect, isn't it?" He asked at last, quietly, something which caused Malik to nod and even pull the Briton a little closer. "It's unreal. It's like someone's writing our lives, like our lives are scripted and the author couldn't be bothered to make this hard for us, or gradual. I keep thinking that now something dreadful will happen, like you'll just… disappear, or melt away, or tell me you're… with someone else."

"I just split with my boy." Malik answered, just as quietly, subjecting Ryou to a calculating stare. "I'm on the lookout for anyone who may come my way, and that I like the look of."

"Oh. And…" Ryou swallowed, looking for the internal bravery it would take to speak the words he wanted to say. In the end he settled for: "do you… um… like the look of me?"

"Only too much." Malik drew Ryou even closer, into a one-armed hug, stepping backwards against the wall to avoid the same dancer that had been the cause of all this from stepping on his feet. "You can let go of my hand now." He added, smirking. Ryou blushed and let go, but didn't pull away as the Egyptian wound his newly freed arm around the pale teen's slender waist.

Yuugi was voyeur-ing on this with a slight smile, feeling only slightly guilty for intruding on Malik's privacy. Despite what Yami thought, Yuugi viewed Malik as a good friend, and had actually felt quite distressed at the blank manner in which the bronze teen spoke of his late boyfriend. Malik deserved Ryou. Ryou, Yuugi knew, hadn't been the luckiest with partners, namely that, to Yuugi's memory, he had only had one, a girl who had only liked him for his accent and had put him down in the most embarrassing way in front of all her friends, and all his friends as well. Ryou deserved Malik.

Now he had established that Malik deserved Ryou and vice versa, Yuugi rose and began to wander along the wall, idly looking for a dance. He had heard through the thought link that Yami would be rather disappointed if his aibou came home single again, and a disappointed-Atem is scarier than an Atem-who's-had-his-box-stolen, as the disappointed-Atem uses the guilt factor. Yuugi sucked with the guilt factor, it was one of his weaknesses that he would always feel guilty.

A bronze, gold-plated forearm wound around the unsuspecting youth's waist, and he jumped in surprise, feeling himself pulled against a lithe, muscular body, trying to twist so he could see the face.

"Malik?" He asked, not without reproach. But Malik was over there, at a table, talking to Ryou – the two were even holding hands over the obstacle while they conversed. That could leave only one possibility for the person who had grabbed him.

Uh oh…

"Not quite." The voice was recognisable as that belonging to Malik's renowned homicidal yami, Marik. Yuugi flinched and tried to squirm away, remembering what had happened on his last encounter with Marik, at Battle City. He had almost lost both himself and the milder Malik to the Shadow Realm, while Yami glared and Marik laughed like a spastic. No taking chances this time.

"Get over it." Marik ordered. "I'm not going to hurt you." The yami spun Yuugi round so the smaller teen could see his face, on which an eyebrow was raised, presumably at the tri-nette's choice of costume. "Interesting outfit. Looks almost cute."

Wait. Did Marik just say cute?

Ceasing his writhing, Yuugi chanced a glimpse up at Marik's face, which had no hint of the usual psychopathic homicidal mania; it was sincere, and almost kind. That, in itself, was a scary thought – what could Marik want with him? The obvious answer of 'SEX!' screamed through his mind, but why him, when Marik could have Bakura, or someone else who was more prone to fatal mood swings, the fatal being for other people.

"So, um…" He wracked his brains for something to say, anything to say… "what are your hobbies?" Bollocks, he hadn't meant to say that!

"Torture, death." Marik shrugged, proving that Malik knew him too well, as that was what had been going through the Egyptian hikari's mind earlier. "You know that shit won't work. I thought you were smart, for a Pharaoh's brat." The tone wasn't condemning, it was mocking, and Yuugi was again surprised; was Marik even capable of affection? Apparently so.

"Ok." Yuugi agreed about 'that shit' not working, trying something else, a much more blunt approach. "What do you want with me, Marik?" Possibly the worst or best question he could ask in that situation, it depends whether you like Yuugi/Marik or not.

In answer, Marik picked Yuugi up with both hands around his waist and pressed him against the wall to hold him there, supporting him so the vertically challenged boy was taller than him for the while. Then the wild-haired yami tilted his head and pressed his lips to Yuugi's in a strong and demanding kiss which left the small tri-nette breathless, though not at one point did he try to pull away. Perhaps Marik wasn't so bad…

Yami, who had been dancing like a spastic, was completely exhausted and went to grab a seat at the bar, grudgingly acknowledging the bartender to have a sexy, muscular body and absolutely gorgeous wild white hair. Then Bakura turned round and Yami almost swallowed a lung – it was that fucking tomb robber! He was in just about every fucking place that the Pharaoh went! It was as though he was waiting for Atem to die just so he could rob his tomb! Radammit!

The Pharaoh could do nothing to stop the blush that was creeping on his cheeks at the discovery that he had actually been hitting on Bakura, despite the fact that the open shirt Ryou's yami was wearing made him look _so hot_, showing off his wonderfully biteable chest… must stop thinking lewd thoughts, must stop thinking lewd thoughts…

Smirking lightly at the red on Yami's cheeks, Bakura reached out to touch one tauntingly, causing the tri-nette yami to pull away.

"What can I get you, _Pharaoh_?" He asked, putting a teasing emphasis on the 'Pharaoh'.

"Anything alcoholic, and make it quick!" Yami snapped, annoyed at having been caught out by Bakura. Was there anything more embarrassing than being embarrassed in front of your enemy? Yes. Being embarrassed in front of your enemy because you were hitting on them.

Wasn't this party turning out to be a soap opera? Would Yami ever get round to his desire of slapping Bakura stupid? Would Ryou and Malik be found shagging in the closet? Would Yuugi come to terms with the fact that Marik had a romantic side? Where the hell were Jou and Kaiba? And just why was Mokuba riding Otogi in the first place?

Who knows…

---

_AN: This fic is going up today, 12/23, in honour of Malik's birthday ( hooray! Dibs on the silly string!). Unfortunately, I'm going on a holiday I don't want to go on, which will take a week of my life, so you'll have to wait a bit for chapter 2. Enjoy._


	2. Such an odd, short conclusion

"You bastard!" escaped Yami's lips as Bakura 'accidentally' tripped and splashed his Malibu on him. Stupid fucking tomb robber! The thought that Bakura existed purely to annoy him ran through the odd-haired Pharaoh's mind, and he glared at the other yami while flicking sweet-tasting alcoholic droplets from his clothes. And just how had Bakura actually managed to get a job in the first place? When his previous work experience was 'tomb robber in ancient Egypt'? It was mind-boggling, even to a strategist like Yami.

The idea that he was the scapegoat of existence coursed vaguely through the Pharaoh's mind. He seemed to be punished for everything. Like why was it on _his_ shoulders that the fate of the world rode? And why the hell had he been locked in the Sennen Puzzle when Bakura and Marik, super-villains that they were, were trapped in _cool_ things? Marik's Sennen Rod had a little knife to stab people with, and Bakura's Ring had tassels for poking. What could he do with the Puzzle, bludgeon people to death?

Deciding that ordering another Malibu probably wasn't the best idea, the long-dead Pharaoh set in an order for a Tequila Sunrise, which, surprisingly enough, didn't end up thrown all over his gothic outfit. Wondering if Bakura was ill, or perhaps in too good (or too drunk) a mood to victimise him like usual, Yami sipped his cocktail slowly, glancing round to see if he could spot Yuugi.

The smaller teen himself was finding, that while Marik was an excellent bodyguard, he was a bit of a setback in the process of meeting and talking to new people; the Egyptian yami was incredibly possessive. The last three times Yuugi had been approached by girls – whether they were flirtatious and scantily-clad or not – Marik had leapt out of the shadows behind the offending teen and loosely wrapped a hand around their throat, pricking at one cheek with a flick-knife. Most got the idea after that, though there was one suicidal girl who had struggled and tried to go to Yuugi and protect him from 'this blonde shit-coloured freak!'. She, of course, was now in a comatose state. Marik may be deranged, but he had a couple of morals (like 'don't kill _everyone_ you meet, leave some for torturing later) and he hated racism.

"Look, Marik…" Yuugi sighed, as his tall stalker materialised eerily by his side. "Can you not attack _everyone_ who comes within fifty feet of me? I would appreciate it. I know that we're technically, you know, together and all, but… please?" The hikari was unaware of his heroic yami's crimson eyes finding him, and Yami sighed. Marik was near Yuugi? That was bad. He would take Yuugi's remains home to his grandfather later and say that he died gloriously and surrounded by enemies, and all that ancient Egyptian crap about what makes you popular and deserving of a decent burial. Sugoroku might not appreciate that, and Yami had a hard time envisioning Yuugi dying fighting a thousand enemies, but that was what imagination was for. Unfortunately, Yami had never approved of imagination; in the hands of someone like Marik, it was downright dangerous.

Leaving the thoughts of mummification and vaguely wondering where he would find someone willing to pull Yuugi's brain out of his nose in preparation for embalming, Yami looked over to see Malik and Ryou – the two had obvious both ingested cheesy romance novels before coming. They hadn't kissed yet. Yami wasn't sure if they'd even moved – both were still holding hands over the table, though they'd stopped talking and were now just staring into each other's eyes. Perhaps they were each trying to make the other spontaneously combust? Or, judging by the position of their arms, maybe they were just having an arm wrestling match? Yami gave off trying to analyse them, as they were making his brain ache. And also Bakura had spotted him.

"Why are you staring at my hikari, Pharaoh?" He asked peevishly. Bakura had a rule that no one eyed Ryou up unless they had permission from him first. Which meant, in theory, Malik would be dying later – but the Egyptian hadn't actually done anything wrong, as he hadn't yet examined the other hikari's body, just stared romantically (soppily, in the opinion of the tomb robber) into each other's eyes. He damn well couldn't kill Malik for that… well, maybe after a drink or six. At any rate, he could always apologise to Ryou and make it up to him by buying an inflatable doll, if only so he could steal it back later and use it himself. The tomb robber had always wanted one of those. Just don't ask.

Talking of blow up dolls… Bakura's eyes drifted over to Otogi – just why the hell was Mokuba riding him anyway? Surely that was paedophilia? With a shifty look this way and that, idly knocking back three consecutive vodka shots along the way, Bakura sidled from behind the bar to listen in on the two black-haired ones' conversation. Past the grunting that Mokuba was giving as Otogi bounced him up and down in a way that was either innocent like a little toddler bouncy or just really rather twisted.

"You should really let me down now, before Onii-chan comes and throws a moody and kills people…" Mokuba was saying. Wise child.

"No." Otogi answered. "You know him. He'll be stringing Jou up by his ankles over a pit of fire ants by now. You know Jou went to complain about that dog picture in his room. Kaiba always wins arguments – Jou's just too… _canine_ to think up responses."

Leaving the two to their friendly bitching, Bakura went back behind the bar, pulling out a small jar of pills and taking at least six with a swig of straight vodka before leaving the bottlett (a kind of small bottle) on the bar near where Yami was sitting, conveniently close so the Pharaoh could read the label: 'Anti-cliché pills. For the stereotypical supervillain and/or hero. One to two pills every clichéd moment. Do not mix with alcohol. Warning, if you are pregnant, menstruating, epileptic, suffering from hypo-glycaemia or abnormal growths, consult a doctor before taking this product'.

Great. So Bakura had not only just overdosed, he had also just mixed these potent drugs with alcohol. Yami still had to check whether he was hypo-glycaemic.

The results of Severely Overdosing Tomb Robber came over a few minutes later, crying on Yami's shoulder. These Anti-Cliché pills really did work well… That thought ran through Atem's mind as he absently patted his mortal enemy in the fluffy white hair.

"It's not fair…" Bakura sobbed brokenly. "Everyone hates me just 'cause I'm evil, no one hates Marik, I'm much better than Marik but everyone still hates me, and I can never win… being evil sucks…"

A twitch in Yami's eye revealed how scarily effective these pills actually were.

"Will you be my friend?" Bakura asked, blinking and sniffling. Yami grit his teeth and somehow managed to force the answer out.

"Yes, I'll be your friend."

"Yay!" Bakura smiled happily and kissed an ever-more disturbed Pharaoh on the cheek. "I love my bestest friend!" And, through the gathering clouds of doom in Yami's mind at wondering how long these pills lasted and what Bakura would be like when the effects wore off, there was some sunshine: Bakura seemed to adore him at the moment. And, damn, Bakura was hot.

"Shall we… find somewhere more private?" The sly question was asked, and Bakura was apparently himself enough to nod, which brought a sigh of relief from Atem – the pills weren't _critically_ strong. Of course, stereotypical supervillains with great bodies are always sex-obsessed. Ask Marik. Yami smiled and led Bakura away from the party, silently asking himself whether the tomb robber was too out of it to be able to 'get it up', though that was a chance he would have to take.

We now interrupt this soon-to-be-sex-scene to bring you important news from Kaiba's quarters.

"Down, boy." The CEO rapped out, actually half expecting Jonouchi to listen to him and sit like a good little doggy. No such luck. Ah well, Kaiba had long ago resigned himself to the fact that none of the Yuugi-tachi would listen to him, no matter how philosophical what he had to say was.

He narrowly dodged a picture of a blonde teen in a doggy suit that was thrown with the force of an Olympic Hammer Thrower at his head, the thrower being the irate blonde teen portrayed within the photograph: Jonouchi.

"How many times must I tell you, wise-ass, I'm not a fucking dog!" Yuugi's best friend snapped, basically growling in his irateness. Kaiba found himself a little disappointed – that one was so easily retorted to. Surely Jou could do better?

"Of course you aren't a fucking dog, puppy." He rolled his azure eyes mockingly. "You're being a good boy and not lusting after poodles indoors. You can fuck other dogs when I let you out for the night."

"_Bastard!_" Was snarled at the businessteen, the rougher highschooler twitching from many places in his cheek. Kaiba bit back a snicker – Jou baiting was just so much fun.

He was mildly surprised, therefore, when Mokuba and Otogi burst into his room, each going to their respective favourite and asking if he/she/it was ok. Kaiba nodded and told Mokuba to bugger off while he killed the nice doggy, to which Mokuba responded that he would rather like to watch Seto try, thank you very much. Seto demanded to know which side Mokuba was on, and Mokuba gave but an airy grin and informed the room that he worked alone and was known to many as 'El Mokubo'.

Then Otogi apologised to Kaiba for allowing Mokuba access to the bar while Bakura was having corrective therapy in Yami's room and began trying to egg Jonouchi on to greater sparring heights, which involved prodding at his weaknesses until the blond was pissed off enough to eat Kaiba. Mmmm, workaholic, the other other white meat.

"Raaaarrrrggggggggh!" Jonouchi gave a scream very much like Tarzan's battlecry and threw a wildly complaining Otogi at Kaiba. Mokuba managed to scoot out of the way just in time, and was gathered up in the arms of the dice-player once he had recovered from Mr Head meeting Mr Wall and pulled out of the room.

The tension in the room was so thick you could call it Anzu.

A tirade of verbal insults followed from Jonouchi, with Kaiba just brushing them away as through they were dust speckles dirtying his beautiful blimp. Then it was Kaiba's turn, and he just pulled out a digitally enhanced picture of Jou with a tail, in a nice dog collar. Which made the blonde even more annoyed as he tried to grab it, the taller one holding it tauntingly out of his reach. That's what you get for going up against a genius. Especially if you're blonde.

If you read this story expecting Jou/Kaiba, it's a kind of hate-hate relationship. You just know that they'll eventually shag, probably in a few lifetimes or so, if you believe in reincarnation. Mind, heaven is different for everyone… perhaps Kaiba _wants_ Jou to be his dog…

Meanwhile, in the Yami/Bakura room, Yami was very happy. Very _very_ happy. Bakura had indeed risen to the occasion, and sex with the tomb robber was very pleasurable. Of course, Yami knew that Yuugi had been sent uncontrolled feelings of pleasure and passion through the mind link and was now cuddling a rather shocked Marik to try and chase away the trauma. Oh well, he might have to explain about the birds and the bees when they got home the next night. He couldn't tonight, of course – tonight he was sleeping with Bakura, having decided to make the most of the tomb robber's anti-cliché phase.

Malik and Ryou had finally moved, going back to Malik's room to talk and cuddle and do other romantic, non-sex-crazed acts of love to each other. Like innocent kisses and playful tickling. Malik had persuaded Marik to stay with Yuugi for the night so that he and Ryou could sleep together. As thin as each was, it was no problem for them both to fit in the single bed side by side, whereas Yami was basically lying on top of Bakura so he wouldn't fall out.

Jou had grumpily retired to his own room, where he had proceeded to smash just about anything that could be broken out of spite, as revenge for the dog insults from Kaiba, and the rest of the Yuugi-tachi were happily going to sleep alone in their own rooms, quite a feat for Anzu the Slag in the minds of many.

Marik didn't need to ask Yuugi's opinion on anything – the vertically challenged teen came with the advantage that you could just pick him up and take him wherever you wanted if he disagreed to your decision, so Marik had picked him up, taken him back to his and the Pharaoh's room and shagged his little body senseless. Now Yuugi was sleeping peacefully, and the psychotic genocide fan had to admit that it was kinda cute how innocent the teen looked when he slept.

Happy couples, happy couples. The blimp disco had now just about ended, and most couples and singles were retiring to their room, though a small group stayed in the disco hall for a gangbang, which were becoming increasingly popular in the third grade, the grade above the Yuugi-tachi. Happy couples, happy days.


End file.
